lostnchina

…because not all of us have our Peking ducks in a row

A Very Chinese Home Remodel

You know your elderly Chinese parents have redefined “home remodeling” when they spend the money they have scrimped and saved over the years on a home remodel that features a … Continue reading

October 18, 2013 · 90 Comments

See Susan Go Camping

I was raised in a campingless household.  My Chinese immigrant parents could never understand how our neighbors – with only $240.38 (Canadian) in their bank account (that was US$1.99 in … Continue reading

August 23, 2013 · 35 Comments

Of Banks & Sex – Banking in 21st Century China

Written in April 2006, before the happy advent of internet banking After two years of living in China, I’ve finally made my first wire transfer at a bank without help from … Continue reading

June 15, 2013 · 12 Comments

Hells Bell’s Palsy: The Symptoms of a Chinese Mother

Bell’s palsy “is a form of facial paralysis resulting from a dysfunction of the …facial nerve… causing an inability to control facial muscles on the affected side…It is thought that … Continue reading

March 24, 2013 · 25 Comments

The Trainer.

Based on events which occurred in a small town in China in 2005 I first saw the Trainer – and I believe that was his name,  as that’s what everyone … Continue reading

February 12, 2013 · 15 Comments

The Power of Poo & Other Cross-cultural Conundrums

When people find out that I *live* in China, they always want to know what it’s like.  And from the way they ask and the expressions on their faces, I … Continue reading

October 15, 2012 · 40 Comments

This Post is Kind of Racist

Originally posted on lostnchina:
I’m ashamed to admit this, but my parents – well, my Mother – after having lived in Canada since the 1970s, has a problem differentiating one…

July 16, 2012 · 2 Comments

How to Succeed at Landing the Chinese Man of Your Nightmares

I know for a sorry fact that, if my Dad were to pass away tomorrow, his greatest regret would not be that 1000+ item Vegas Strip buffet he never tried, … Continue reading

May 8, 2012 · 36 Comments

Chinese Chicken Gizzard & Testicle Soup for the Soul: Inspiration for the Uninspirable

You drink this soup I made for you; it will make you stronger and smarter and give you chi.  You don’t do what I say, you’ll die a slow and … Continue reading

April 25, 2012 · 21 Comments

I’m Not Your Amway-Hooker, Travel-Sexcort, Chinabride, Mother-May-I, Ex-Girlfriend-Stand-In: A Scientific Analysis of Susan’s Dating History

Some of you may be saddened to learn that I’ve broken up with the guy mentioned in Why I’m Still Sarcastically Single Part One: Steak.  The relationship lasted a bit … Continue reading

April 15, 2012 · 43 Comments

The Day I Tried to Cut Down on My Drinking

I might sound like a big lush lurching through life, but I drink at the most two (ladylike) glasses of wine a day. However, over the holidays – Thanksgiving 2011, … Continue reading

April 12, 2012 · 8 Comments

For the Caregivers of the English-impaired

When people ask me what languages I know, of course English and Chinese come to mind.  French was mandatory till Grade 10, but that doesn’t mean I’d retained any.  I … Continue reading

February 21, 2012 · 14 Comments

That Chinese Chick Can’t Cook Rice

For my birthday I had a group of friends over to my place for a birthday / leftover X’mas / Chinese New Year hot pot (fondue) dinner. Traditionally in the … Continue reading

February 10, 2012 · 24 Comments

More a Tweet Than a Post: Happy Chinese New Year!

A few posts back I promised to display my latest Chinese New Year acquisition – the 2012 edition of the Chinese New Year red panty, which my mother sent me … Continue reading

January 25, 2012 · 16 Comments

Lies My Superstitious Chinese Mother Told Me & the Longevity Panty

I’m the first-born byproduct of old-world Chinese parents.  My Father is nearly twice my age and my Mother is  irrational, but has very nice skin. My Mother, like many Chinese … Continue reading

December 31, 2011 · 38 Comments

Ode to Alcohol

Just having returned from China, walking into a US liquor store was as close to a religious experience as I was ever going to get: I almost dropped to my … Continue reading

December 27, 2011 · 9 Comments

My Favorite Chinese Stereotype: The Chinese Lotus Blossom vs. The Dragon Lady

How many times have you driven behind an erratic driver and thought, “Man, that driver’s got to be Chinese.  He/she drives horribly!” – only to feel so guilty immediately afterwards, … Continue reading

November 28, 2011 · 16 Comments

This Post is Kind of Racist

I’m ashamed to admit this, but my parents – well, my Mother – after having lived in Canada since the 1970s, has a problem differentiating one Caucasian from the next. … Continue reading

October 27, 2011 · 29 Comments

Drink, Drank, Drunk in China, A Woman’s Perspective

Remember a young and fresh-faced Karen Allen as Marion Ravenwood in “Raiders of the Lost Ark”, winning a drink-off with some large, boorish  guy at the beginning of the movie, … Continue reading

October 25, 2011 · 11 Comments

Too Fat for China: Confessions of a Size 4 Chinese-Canadian in China

As I’ve said in a previous post, it’s a well-known fact and an utter phenomenon that Chinese women can eat twice their weight in food and never gain an ounce, … Continue reading

October 18, 2011 · 22 Comments

Lost in Translation – Why I’m Not an Interpreter

My Mother often asks me why I don’t step up and help foreigners translate, as they stammer and gulp their way through the simplest things, like asking where the bathroom … Continue reading

September 2, 2011 · 32 Comments

The Tao of Haggling – From Someone Who Hates to Bargain

Sometimes I think i should not have been born Chinese: My ability-to-haggle-gene must have  been destroyed when I integrated into Western society… along with my propensity to carry large wads … Continue reading

February 1, 2007 · 3 Comments
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